quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
The convent might be a nice break from real life
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
