Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
