Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
