You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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