no. you can't hotbox the world.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
