I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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