Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
