Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
