none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
