I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize