apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
