It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
