A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
