I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
