it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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