You can't motorboat a personality
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
