i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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