he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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