i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
