Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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