May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I love you. Go after that dick
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
