I'll bet she douches with gravy.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize