we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
