That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
