bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
