3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I don't think brook has ever known best
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
