I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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