hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Rumble strips road head = magical
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
