Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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