And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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