it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
