you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize