weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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