Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
