I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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