well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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