My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
