This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
