also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
