I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
