I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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