Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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