Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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