Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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