i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
