We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
