I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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