I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
