i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
