he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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